Do you remember waaaaaay back when having a day off meant Saturday, and Saturday meant waking up at the crack of dawn to plop yourself in front of the television set with a bowl of sugar based cereal substitute to watch Saturday morning cartoons? Yeah, me neither. But that’s okay. Let’s get NOSTALGIC!
In the far off reaches of space, lies a planet whose inhabitants are not made of flesh and blood, but instead, metal and synthetic oil. The inhabitants of this planet have divided themselves into two factions. Ideologically, you’d never be able to tell them apart, but fortunately for you, they have easily distinguishable logos stamped on their foreheads. When their war makes its way across the universe to your planet, you (yes you!) alone stand between them and the destruction of your world. Which side will you choose? It’s a Monday, specifically September 17, 1984, and you are face to face with The Transformers.
War between the “good” Autobots and the “bad” Decepticons spreads from their home world of Cybertron when a ship containing Autobots crash lands on Earth. In repairing the damaged Autobots, the ship’s computer uses Earth machines as a template, having decided that they are the dominant life form on the planet. All of which “was tied in with a Hasbro line of ‘morphing’ toys — robots which could turn into automotive vehicles, and vice versa.”
What I remember
“Transformers! Robots in disguise!” One Christmas morning… when I was maybe 5 years old …I unwrapped my very own Transformer. It wasn’t one of the main characters (maybe some kind of sports car), but that didn’t matter. It was all mine! Well it was all mine for all of five minutes before I was ordered by my parents to let my little sister play with it. And for all of less than a minute before she snapped one of its arms off. And I then got in trouble for not supervising her. I remember being less than amused. Am I still bitter about it now 30+ years later? …moving on…
For purposes of this rewatch, I chose Transformers: The Movie 20th Anniversary Special Edition. In the far off year of 2005 (yes, 2005!), the struggle between the Autobots and the Decepticons continues. Elsewhere, a planet sized cybernetic lifeform called Unicorn is devouring planets inhabited by other cybernetic lifeforms after sneaking up on them. Only a fabled mcguffin, called the “Matrix of Leadership”, can stop it from doing the same to Cybertron, home to both the Autobots and the Decepticons. Will the Autobots and the Depticons be able to put aside their differences in order to save their home or will Megatron and Starscream take turns betraying everyone? The answer is yes.
Transformers: The Movie had some things going for it, like big name voice actors (Eric Idle from Monty Python, Leonard Nemoy from Star Trek and Orson Welles) and a decent synth pop-rock soundtrack (including Weird Al’s Dare to be stupid). If you like robots and rayguns, check it out.
If you liked The Transformers
Also check out
Other editions of Saturday Morning Cartoon Rewatch by Kevin
More to come (live from what I remember about the 80’s!) as this story continues.
Kevin Wadlow is 100% a real human being and definitely not a murder of crows wearing a person suit. He is an avid reader of horror, tabletop gamer, and drinker of coffee who enjoys drawing things of strangeness along the way. When the zombie apocalypse comes, he will probably be eaten first after saying something about how he fully expected to go out like this.